We like to imagine ourselves as independent. Masters of our own fate. In control. Even in our spiritual lives, we may pride ourselves on how well we follow the Light, how earnestly we seek God’s will, how obediently we walk the path laid before us.

But what about when we’re not so good at following?

What about the days when we’re distracted, discouraged, or even defiant—when we stray, stumble, or sit down entirely, arms folded, muttering, “I don’t feel like it today”?

Here is a grace too often overlooked: Even then, we are still being led.

The Psalmist writes, “If I make my bed in the depths, You are there” (Psalm 139:8). The truth is, God’s presence doesn’t waver when our attention does. The Spirit does not stop leading just because we’ve temporarily taken a detour to “do things our own way” (which, historically, has mixed results).

The early Friends spoke often of “the Light that enlightens every person.” That Light is not conditional. It does not flicker out because we looked away. It does not retreat when we wander. The Light shines in the darkness—and the darkness has not overcome it (John 1:5).

Sometimes we learn more from our detours than we do from our discipline. Sometimes being led means being guided gently back after we’ve lost the trail. Other times it means God simply walks beside us as we sit in our confusion, or waits patiently while we attempt to solve our spiritual lives with spreadsheets.

To be led doesn’t always feel like movement. Sometimes it feels like stillness. Like silence. Like nothing at all.
(Also, sometimes it feels like standing in the kitchen, staring into the fridge, hoping the Holy Spirit will tell you what’s for dinner.)

But here’s the quiet truth that holds us together: God is still leading. Always.

So even when you don’t know the way—or aren’t walking it—don’t despair. The path is still there. The Shepherd is still calling. And the Light still shines.

You don’t have to have it all together. You don’t have to be a perfect follower. You just have to be willing to listen again. Look again. Be found again.

Because even if you’re not following, you are still being led.

–BC